Tuesday, September 2, 2008

today was a good day until now

Today is my birthday. It was nice and I am happy to report it is the first birthday in 15 years I have not thought about SI or had suicidal ideation.

That was the best present I could possibly have.

Until a few minutes ago when I started to crash. I've been feeling kind of poorly all day- my throat felt strange, but I had tea and honey and a vitamin pill and it felt better.

About an hour ago it got worse. Right now I cannot swallow. I get a strep throat once a year, and it looks like I am due.

On top of that, the crash, from the happiness. it is only ten pm (do you know where your children are?) and it's the dark night of the soul, Churchill's black dog has me in it's incisors and his holding me down fast.

I had a post to put up for today. It needs a final proof for content and spelling
I don't have the energy to do it. I just want to go to bed and sleep like Sleeping Beauty.

Oh well. In the immortal words of Scarlet O'Hara, "Tomorrow is another day"


Sandy Naiman said...

Happy Birthday, Susan...
Even if it wasn't all happy and you're feeling sick, at least for a while, it was a good day and good old Scarlett was right.
Sleep well, and keep on writing. Tomorrow, give yourself a present. Have a "Be Good To Me Day."

You deserve it.

All the best and better!

Mary said...

Susan, happy birthday, Sorry your not feeling that great, but hang in there, it will pass, and hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. I really like your blog and will return..take care Mary

Jena said...

We haven't met, but I was passing by and wanted to say hello and wish you a happy birthday. I hope things continue to just get better for you. take care :)

Ana said...

Happy Birthday, Susan
Hope you sleep well.
It's always like this when we are recovering. Little by little good times comes and goes...
You will find your way.
I assure you!
Take care.

susan said...

Hello Sandy, Mary, Jena, and Ana.

Thank you so much for the happy wishes. it was a good day.... just ate way too much dinner.....

I am blessed to have such wonderful peeps reading this blog.

Radagast said...

My best birthday was my 21st, which I spent with a mate of mine, visiting Sun City (I was working near Pretoria, at the time). We had a couple of days off, and decided on the spur of the moment to fly up there, so we booked tickets, and made a dash to Jan Smuts, in Jo'burg. We were having a spliff in the blokes' bogs, when our flight was called, as I recall.

Anyway, we just spent two days getting stoned and pissed (drunk), in turn, the highlight of which was watching the crocodiles get fed, while we toked away (that doesn't really explain how delightfully surreal the occasion was - you'll just have to take my word for it)! Obviously, I don't advocate the gratuitous inhalation of banned substances, but the greatest pleasures in life, I find, are the simple ones.

I wish you a birthday as good as my 21st, next year, whatever form it takes.


Anonymous said...

Belated happy birthday, Susan...!

Glad to hear at least part of it was good.


Radagast said...

Oh, I forgot to mention: the flight to Sun City from Jan Smuts was in a 4-seater Cessner, or something. It was the following day before our ears "popped"!

We went on a bar crawl, that first night (there were 20+ bars in Sun City, if I remember, aright), and we spent it bellowing at one another, in our efforts to hold a conversation. Like I wrote: delightfully surreal!


Raspberry said...

Happy birthday
Hope you're feeling brighter soon
Rasp xXx

Jazz said...

Happy Birthday, Susan!
Sorry you're feeling bad...hope it gets better soon.
Hugs and good thoughts coming your way.

Not Very Anonymous Mom said...

i don't understand the whole birthday/depression phenomenon... you're not alone in this, that i know.

take care, i'm hopeful that some sleep will help you out.

Stephany said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
susan said...

@Radagast- I wish I was with you on that birthday. It sounds like fun. Someday I have to tell you about my pub crawl around that took me from a curry house in Bradford all the way up to Blackpool.

@Jessi, thank you, it was good!

@Raspberry, thank you!

@Jazz, thank you. I loved reading your blog yesterday btw. I never got the knack of knitting but I loved doing embroidery.

@Mom- Hi Mom! September is a bad month in my family. Both of my grandmothers passed in Sept. I really miss them.

@ Stephany- I am thinking of you on a mountain, totally fearless, your blonde tresses flowing in the wind as you are in that quick moment of being and about to go down the mountain. What a beautiful picture.

susan said...

Oh folks, thank you.

It ended badly because I had dinner with my parents and had a huge steak. The cow did not die in vain, but my tummy hurts today from eating too much of it.

I hadn't had a steak in over two years. Oh gosh it was good....

Gianna said...

Happy Birthday a bit late dear Susan.

I'm having a hard time keeping up with everyone right now...

Know that you've touched my heart, even if I' not here everyday...
love to you on your birthday (week)


Stephany said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
John D said...

Susan, I not only want to wish you a happy birthday, OK a little late, I'd also like to give you an award. Take a look at today's post on my blog. Thanks so much for your fine writing and honesty, as well as helpful comments.

Catatonic Kid said...

Happy Birthday! Totally unfair to get sick on your birthday. That's against the rules, I'm sure ;) Hope you feel better soon!

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