Monday, May 3, 2010
I dreamed I was pregnant, woke up and I'm numb. Wish I could write but too depressed to even do that, everything I touch dies. May is my waste land. I kill all I touch.
I'm sorry, I just cannot stop thinking about my son. I don't know why, I haven't thought about him this much in years, the poor thing never had a chance and lately he's been in my dreams. Maybe he's been reincarnated this time successfully as a person. Maybe he made it. All I know is right now I miss him so much I cannot write, all I can do is cry the blue out of my eyes and the pain is excruciating. I've always been told that a parent would die for their children. I believe it. I would have died for you, and I never met you.