I came across Christa-or maybe she came across me, back in September when my friend Kevin suicided. I have taken a lot of comfort from her site,"Giggle On' over the last few months, and it has helped me in my healing. I don't think I could have made closure if it wasn't for her and her amazing site.
She posted this the other day on her blog, and has kindly given me permission to reprint and link to it.
25 Tips for Survivors of Suicide
For those of you not familiar with the term survivor of suicide - let me explain the meaning. First, I will explain what the phrase does not mean. Survivor of suicide is not used to describe a person who attempts suicide but does not complete the act. Rather, the term describes loved ones left behind to mourn after the tragedy of suicide.
25 TIPS FOR SURVIVOR’S OF SUICIDE
Know you can survive. You may not think so, but you can.
Struggle with “why” it happened until you no longer need to know “why” or until you are satisfied with partial answers.
Know you may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your feelings but all your feelings are normal.
Anger, guilt, confusion, forgetfulness are common responses. You are not crazy-you are in mourning.
Be aware you may feel appropriate anger at the person, at the world, at God, at yourself.
You may feel guilty for what you think you did or did not do
Please keep reading here.
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8 comments:
Susan:
I am deeply touched and truly honored to have helped you in some small way with closure after Kevin's death. Giggle On has been a healing journey for me too and with support of people like you, I have the fuel I need to keep going...to Giggle On! as it were.
The human spirit is amazing and we have the ability to triumph even after tragic and sad things happen. We can learn to love, learn to laugh and learn to be happy. I spent YEARS in a quagmire of depression and with a lot of work, and I think, divine help, I've come out on the other side and now, LOVE life.
I just celebrated my 49th birthday and frankly, never thought I would live to see my 30th so each new day is a real gift for me.
Jim's death, his suicide, was a huge wake up call for me. I am determined to help other survivor's of suicide in any way I can. I hope my site helps people.
Thanks for adding me to your blog roll and for spreading the word.
Don't Give Up! Don't Give In!
Life is Beautiful.
Enjoy, Smile, Appreciate and...
Get your Giggle On!
oh...I have met Christa too! and yes, she's lovely!
Christa, I am not a Suicide Survivor, but one of my best friends lost her son when he was 18...I'm going to share this with her...
love to you.
you know, it's weird, I just said I'm not a Suicide Survivor and that's not true.
In high school my best freind's boyfriend who was also a good friend of mine suicided in a violent and ugly way...
I'm 44 now and suffered so many other traumas I didn't even remember it right off the bat...but it was awful and I was sooo angry with him and hurt and I missed him too...but I intuitively knew it was okay to have all those feelings and I let myself have them...and so maybe that is why I didn't remember just now...I'm really quite healed of that particular trauma...
so I also want to add..it's okay to be mad as heck at the person who suicides, because I was...he did a violent act in front of my best friend...and there was pressure not to feel those feelings...
anyway..thanks for your work.
I came across Christa also about 3 or 4 months ago. She has been very helpful for me as a suicide survivor. Thanks for giving her a shout out and for reminding me about her wonderful website that is very sunny and positive.
Thank you both of you for this.
Isn't it amazing how we reach each other out here in the blogosphere? Some things just go straight to the heart... so cool :)
Susan - How are you doing? Have been thinking about you lately. My daughter had her bone marrow biopsy - so far so good!
Looking forward to some posts from you. Keep well - keep safe.
Wendy
Hi,
Thanks for posting this 25 Tips for Survivor's of Suicide. Really very amazing..
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